Healing is a profound journey that transcends the physical realm. As I embarked on my path to recovery, seeking physical therapy for my nagging Back pain, I stumbled upon a remarkable discovery—the striking parallels between healing emotional wounds and physical injuries. In this article, join me as we delve into these revelations together.
When emotional hurt or trauma strikes, our natural instinct is to shield ourselves from further pain. We develop safeguards, avoiding situations that remind us of the past. With my back injury, it wasn’t much different. Over time, I started to believe I couldn't perform certain movements because doing so might aggravate the injury and pain.
But, at the same time, I realized that by avoiding these movements, I was limiting my strength and mobility. I was protecting myself from further pain and injury, but at what cost? The cost of becoming physically stronger and more agile.
My physical therapist helped me to see that I was tensing up when it came time to try the same movements that had hurt me in the past. I had learned to protect myself from physical injury the same way we protect ourselves from emotional injury- I was tensing up and not letting myself come near that thing, person, experience (or in this case, movement) again!
That is so necessary and yet, if we stop there, we don't heal, learn, and recover from the things that negatively impacted and traumatized us. Yes, self-preservation is vital, but it can also hold us back from embracing life's full potential.
To truly heal, we need to cultivate a safe haven within ourselves. This means fostering a nurturing relationship with our inner being and offering the reassurance and support we desperately need in order to feel safe in those moments of fear and vulnerability.
With the support and safety of our inner sanctuary or safe haven, we can begin to gradually reintroduce ourselves to the elements that once caused us pain. After all, that’s what healing really is… our ability to relearn and rebuild in a now safe environment.
With my physical therapy, this meant learning functional skills to perform the movements safely and to know that there was no danger of extreme injury- which my physical therapist confirmed- so that my body would feel safe enough to come near the same movements that had hurt it in the past. And breathing… lots of breathing…!
But it wasn't just about trusting my physical therapist. It was about trusting myself. It was only when I developed an inner relationship and dialogue within myself, reassuring myself that it was now safe to engage in those activities, that I started to truly heal the pain.
And it's the same with my emotional pain and traumas. As my back recovery demanded functional skills, emotional healing demands developing resilience in facing challenging situations. With caution and care, we shoulder the pain (pun intended 🙂) and take measured strides toward regaining our own and others’ confidence and trust.
Nurturing Our Inner Sanctuary
One of my biggest revelations while in physical therapy is that the journey of healing, whether emotional or physical, is not about avoiding everything that reminds us of past hurt but learning to create a sanctuary of self-compassion within ourselves. It's a sacred space where we embrace our pain with kindness and understanding, noticing its presence without judgment. Only when we develop this inner relationship and reassure ourselves that it's now safe to engage in certain activities can we truly heal.
For a long time, I stayed away from people, situations, and things that reminded me of the people, situations, and things that had hurt me in the past. I avoided all the potentially triggering situations. And sometimes, I still do. But it didn't make sense to stay away from everything that reminded me of who and what had hurt me- those people and things were anomalies, not the norm. But before I could welcome those things back into my life, my body needed to believe that I was indeed safe.
And so, within the depths of my being, I built a sanctuary, a sacred space where I could nurture my inner self... where I could care for myself enough to really know that I was no longer in the same danger as I had been before.
This sanctuary became a sanctuary of self-compassion... a place where I learned to embrace my pain with kindness and understanding, noticing its presence without judgment.
This sanctuary became a sanctuary of self-compassion... a place where I learned to embrace my pain with kindness and understanding, noticing its presence without judgment.
My biggest learning?
That it's only by creating a safe environment inside ourselves and taking careful, gradual steps that we can overcome the fears that live within us and find the courage to reclaim our lives.
Healing, whether emotional or physical, is a practical journey of acquiring skills, creating safety, and fostering an empowering relationship with ourselves. Initially, we need to avoid triggering events, but with time, we can reintroduce ourselves to them with care, utilizing breathing techniques and reminding ourselves that we are no longer in the same danger as before.
Overcoming Fear and Reclaiming Life
And so, whether it's overcoming emotional scars or mending physical injuries, healing is a practical journey of acquiring skills, creating safety, and fostering an empowering relationship with ourselves. Initially, we need to avoid triggering events, but with time, we can reintroduce ourselves to them with care. With patience, self-compassion, and a touch of courage, we can remind ourselves that we are no longer in the same danger as before, unleash the power of healing, and reclaim our lives.
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